Bounce Away....

Franki and I were in the party store, and as she eagerly picked a ball up to bounce it, I said out loud,(not just in my head),“Franki, don’t bounce the ball in the store, ok”?  With precision timing, a friend that I haven’t seen in a while appeared and said, “what fun would that be?  We are in a party store”!

I like having fun and I like to play and I like being silly, and in that moment, I was focused on something other than having fun.   The simplicity of her statement helped me recognize that I was operating on “auto-pilot” under the guise of some sort of a rule for appropriate behavior in a party store.  Here is this child, zealous about life, seeing every place as an opportunity for play, filled with delight at the sight of these balls, and I, the “reasonable and rule-bound adult” in her life, asking her not to bounce a ball in a party store?!?  I recognized the irony of what I was saying and I immediately grabbed a bouncy ball and bounced it myself.  There are rules to play by and there are socially acceptable behaviors to which we comply and live by, but in every case I want to encourage Franki’s play and love of life and mostly, her freedom within any self-imposed boundary that I or anyone else has established.  Every day I find myself asking this question, “how can I be more flexible” and every day, I give myself opportunities to be just that.  I know my child and I know that she’s not destructive or disrespectful of other people’s property and I know that in that moment, she demonstrated and provided me with an opportunity to be more flexible.  And why would I bounce a ball in a store, a party store of all things???  Because it’s fun.  Go give it try….

What a difference a poopie makes

You’ve heard the saying, “what a difference a day makes”….???  Well, I’m making up a new saying, “what a difference a poopie makes”.  And, what does this have to do with you?  I’ll get to that….

Franki, “before poop” and “after poop” is a totally different person.   Before poop and constipated, she’s cranky, irritable, and certainly not the happy little girl we’re used to interacting with.  After poop, she’s full of energy, laughing, playful and cooperative and eager about life.   Anything that you focus on for a length of time, or in a way that consistently doesn’t feel good to you; that you continually regurgitate by thinking about or talking about in a way that holds you to a place of not feeling any improvement about it, that’s you making yourself constipated.  Energy is always in motion. Food in, food out.  Air in, air out.  Emotions flow naturally unless you stop them.  Your feelings always improve unless you keep revisting the same thoughts that feel bad.  So if feeling constipated doesn’t feel good and you find a way to get relief from that, why would you keep thinking and talking about those things that don’t feel good without trying to find relief?  The way to feeling relief about it is by letting it go.  And by letting it go I don’t mean just use words to cover up how you really feel; I mean, let it go by reaching for a different perspective that feels better; find a way of interpreting your experience in a way that feels better; find a way to substitute the thing that bothers you with thoughts about those things that don’t.  So what kind of poopie are you constipated with?

The “my employees are tools” poopie?

The “good employees are hard to find” poopie?

The “my boss is an asshole” poopie?

The “it’s all your fault I feel like this” poopie?

The “I never get what I want” poopie?

The “people are stupid” poopie?

The “life is hard” poopie?

The “I never have enough money” poopie?

The “that bastard cheated on me” poopie?

The “life isn’t fair” poopie?

The “I hate my body” poopie?

The “I’m not good enough” poopie?

The “I’m not satisfied with where I am” poopie?

The “let me tell you what’s going wrong in my life” poopie?

The “this is not happening fast enough” poopie?

The “relationships are hard” poopie?

The “look at the state of our economy” poopie?

The “this government needs to change” poopie?

The “I need you to be different” poopie?

The “what can I complain about” poopie?

Sooooo many poopies, so little time ;)  Clearly, there are all kinds of poopies that keep you from allowing things to flow.   So the next time you find yourself complaining, or regurgitating something that bothers you or repeatedly thinking about that person who irritates you, equate that to feeling constipated…do you want to feel better or not?  

A Blue bird, White Bowl and a Yellow Butterfly

The other day, just for fun and silliness and to distract Franki from something she was unhappily focused on, I said, “hey Franki…guess what?!?  Today we’re going to see a blue bird, a white bowl and a yellow butterfly”.  I said the first things that popped into my thoughts.  Did it matter if we saw them?  No.  Did I try to manipulate anything so that we could see them?  No.  I already know that I’m the creator of my reality.  I already know that anything I want is mine to have and to experience to the extent that I allow it and I don’t need to “test” Law of Attraction to see if it works.  So the point here is that I didn’t have a preconceived notion of how or where I would see these things and it really didn’t matter if I saw them at all, it really was just a way for me to bring Franki’s awareness to something else.   A little later that day, as we strolled happily along the streets of a nearby town, I was inspired to look down at the sidewalk and noticed a single wing of a butterfly…in blue.  I chuckled to myself as I made the association to what I’d said earlier and found humor in the idea that it was the combination of two things…the blue bird and a butterfly.  We were about to sit at a particular place for lunch that seemed like a great place, the food looked yummy and the place was full…all indications that this would be a good place to eat, but I just wasn’t “feeling it” and just as I was considering whether to sit down or not, someone took the last outdoor table that was available.   Instead, we went to the place that I’d felt drawn to go to that was just down the street.  Jack and I both ordered from the menu and I ordered a lunch made up of a combination of things for Franki.  Our meals came served on white plates, while Franki’s watermelon, sliced manchengo cheese and bread came in a white bowl.  That evening, just prior to putting Franki to bed, my attention rested on her t-shirt of choice, sprinkled with blue and pink butterflies, and among them, yellow butterflies and moments later as we were about to turn the television off, two blue birds came fluttering across the screen.  There are so many simple ways to be delighted in a day and there are so many ways to focus your attention on what feels good in your experience.  I believe I’m always being given impulses to think and impulses to go places and impulses to do things and I believe that it wasn’t by “chance” that we came to eat at the very place we ate at, and it wasn’t “coincidence” that I ordered something for Franki that came delivered in a white bowl and I believe that the Universe is always playing with me and eager to please me in ways that will continually reflect that I’m the creator of my reality.  Everything can be this easy, the only difference is “what am I putting in the way” of what’s so ready to be delivered to me?   In this case, it was all in fun; I wasn’t attached to an outcome; I didn’t need anything to manifest to test how good I am at manifesting; I didn’t need validation in any way, and I wasn’t “holding out” on having a really fun day until I got to see all of those things.   You get to have whatever you want, and the Universe has it all lined up for you, and there are multiple ways and multiple combinations for you to experience it all…the question is, how much crap are you putting in the way of it?  

For Franki...

You’re under no obligation to fulfill some version of you that I’ve created.  That’s my job.  You’re off the hook for ever needing to live up to some expectation that I have of you.  That’s up to me as well.  I hold you not responsible to answer to me or to validate me or to please me.  All of that, also up to me.  You are free.  I want nothing from you and want everything for you that you want for yourself as you define it.  My greatest value to you is to hold you in your highest, not only for your benefit but mostly for my own.  And to my alignment I hold true.  I am devoted to my alignment.  

I wrote this with Franki as my focus, and realized that this applies to anyone I love, know, or interact with.....

Being Silly

Picture this….five adults in a Walgreens, laughing uncontrollably as we played with an updated version of the whoopee cushion known as… a “Flarp”.  Yes, Flarp in hand, I laughed so hard my eyes watered and I almost peed my pants.  For those of you who know me, this little display and fascination with the whoopee cushion comes as no surprise, but to those with whom I was with, I think it was indeed a surprise.   I was there as the “life coach” for the weekend and so there may or may not have been some level of expectation from myself and others as to what type of behavior would fall under the category of “appropriate”.   The combination of all of it made the moment so funny.  Here we were, this small group of five people, just getting to know each other, already primed for fun, and we come face to face with a Flarp.  I couldn’t resist…a Flarp on a shelf is just begging for attention, don’t you think?  Every one of us joined in on the fun, and every one of us gave in to the moment and any inhibitions or notion of appropriate behavior were forgotten and we fully embraced the opportunity to Flarp.  The next day, one of the guys that was amongst our group of five shared with me that my silliness and eagerness for play created the space for him to be playful and to just “let ‘er rip” ….pun intended… where normally, he wouldn't have done that.  He said he hadn't laughed so hard in years and that moving forward, he wanted to have more fun and play.   Although that sort of behavior is nothing uncommon for me, I had no idea of the impact it would have on another.   I didn’t do it because I was trying to have any sort of impact; I did it because I just couldn’t help myself but to cease the opportunity for fun.   It was another reminder to me that the best example and the most service I can be to any other person is be joyful, to be happy, to play and to have fun.  We did no harm in that store and in fact, several people who were within sight or ear-shot of us got in on the giggles too.   There are moments of inspiration to be found in every day and there are ways that you’ll affect people in ways you may never know and one of the best ways I know how to do that is to feel good which creates the space for others to feel their joy.  

Just imagine....

The other day, Franki was sitting in the back seat of my car (actually it’s her car as she refers to it), and she dropped something on the floor.  She asked me to get it and I replied that I couldn’t reach it.  Her response to that?  “Yes you can mommy…just imagine”.    It made me laugh because her response was so matter-of-fact.  She reminded me that with my imagination, I can.  With my imagination, I can go to places I’ve never been, I can see things I want to see, I can feel things I want to feel and I can create things I want to create.  My imagination is limitless in any direction I point it.  I can have any experience I want with my imagination…with it, I can experience a place without needing to be there; I can have the experience of something without needing to have it in my possession; I can imagine something as I want it to be, imagine preferable conditions if they’re not quite as I prefer, imagine anything that I prefer without needing anything to change in my immediate experience.  But what has changed by using my imagination, is how I feel.  Imagination is something we’re all born with and in some scenarios, are trained away from.  My child, by being who she is, is a constant reminder to me that what I cannot see is real.  It’s as real as I can imagine it to be, and if I can imagine it, it is.

Can I get in now, mommy?

I’ve assumed that Franki’s lack of understanding or lack of comprehension that sometimes there’s a “wait” time or a lag time between her asking for something and her receiving it was due to her age and stage of development….until today.  As she repeatedly asked, “can I get in now, mommy?  …. Now, mommy?.....Now, mommy?” when referring to whether she could get in the tub or not, I suddenly wondered if the misunderstanding wasn’t mine, rather than hers.  Maybe she understands it the way it really is; afterall, she’s closer to her knowing and closer to Source from her perspective…in other words, she hasn’t been trained to think or believe differently and hasn’t been socialized to expect things to take awhile, or to take time, or to manifest before her eyes before she believes it, or even not to expect to get what she wants.  She always expects to get what she wants…she doggedly stays focused on her desire, even if she hears me say something that would contradict her desire or indicate that she’s not going to get what she wants.  It’s as if she doesn’t even hear me.  One could interpret that as meaning that she’s stubborn, defiant or not listening to me, but I have to wonder about all of those things.  I think those “labels” are placed on children (and people in general) when they (the people who we’re addressing) aren’t doing what we want them to do.  “So if you’re not going to please me or do as I say because you don’t want to, you’re stubborn”; or, “you’re defying me because you’re not doing as I told you”.  Why would they if they’re being ordered to do something they don’t want to do?  Do you like being told what to do?!?  Anyway, the point is, maybe there’s more to consider about the idea that “children just don’t understand the concept of time” or that they’re “impatient”.  Maybe they know something we don’t; or rather, something that we knew when we were younger and have been trained away from or forgotten over time……  That you should expect to get what you want, and that it’s immediate….maybe not in the sense that we’ve come to translate manifestation as in “I see it, touch it and its tangible”.  They understand that manifestation occurs as immediately as the desire is born.  Source answers and revels in the desire and the emotion that you feel is the manifestation and you don’t have to wait for the “thing” to happen to have the manifestation….you can feel it now. 

I’m not always in the place or the space to take that perspective when I’m hearing “I want this now, I want this now, I want this now”, simultaneously on this and this and this request…but….when I’m not in the middle of the frenzy, I can reach for that perspective more and more and make it more and more a part of my awareness, and over time, those “frenzied” moments will be met with more understanding than interpreting that my child is impatient or lacks understanding.  Once again, Franki has made me re-think what I thought to be “truth”.